![]() ![]() (Did the filmmakers not even watch the original movies?!) And instead of Joe Pesci, Marv is partnered with his new wife Vera (played by GALAXY QUEST’s Missi Pyle). Enter beloved wet/sticky bandit Marv! Instead of the great Daniel Stern, this time around we’re subjected to French Stewart playing Marv, despite the fact that he dresses and acts just like Harry. I feel like most judicial systems would allow kid-murder in situations like that.īecause of her wealth, the dad’s girlfriend is hosting the British royal family at her house, a perfect opportunity for some ne’er-do-well to kidnap the young prince. Kevin destroys her billion-dollar, technologically advanced house more than once and she barely scolds him. The script also tries hard to paint the stepmom as an evil bitch so you’ll root against her, but she’s really not that bad. Dad is getting ready to propose to his new sugar mama, but since this is a crappy family movie I’ll let you guess how that ends up. Kevin’s father is now dating a young, hot, unbelievably rich woman who lives in a giant automated “smart” house where everything is voice activated. Despite his family’s presence, the 9 year old is able to “run away” by calling and taking a taxi-no questions asked-to his dad’s house without anybody noticing or caring. Fed up with his siblings and once again feuding with his mom, Kevin aspires to be isolated in his residence and gets his wish-sort of. Is he talking about his career or just this movie in particular? Because it could be both, honestly.īy this point, the rest of Kevin’s extended family has also either died of malnourishment or been left at random houses, since he now only has one sister and brother Buzz, who for some reason has devolved in to a tiny ginger. This time though, Kevin’s parents are divorced (I guess abandoning your child more than once takes its toll on your marriage) and the film opens with a serious discussion about broken families during the holidays, while the main character watches old home videos of happier times. However, against all odds, HOME ALONE 4: TAKING BACK THE HOUSE brings back Kevin McCalister for one last go-around. HOME ALONE 3 understood the statistical improbability of the same child a) being left by his parents a third time and b) encountering the same two robbers (who theoretically should be in prison), and instead focused on another discarded crimefighting kid. ![]() “Hi, I’m the vaguely ethnic, non-threatening, well-spoken supporting character you ordered.” I only share this embarrassing story because I’m sure the terrible planned sequels my 7 year old brain concocted are still better than this garbage movie that a group of real adults made. In #4 everyone went to Hawaii (I’m 100% not kidding ask my dad), while HOME ALONE 5: THE RETURN brought the action back home to close out the series. The third one introduced me as a secondary main character to team up with Kevin McCallister. And ever the aspiring filmmaker, I had detailed sequels planned out for HOME ALONE 3, 4 and 5. I was just a child when the first two HOME ALONE movies came out and to say the fantasy of no adult supervision and extreme cartoon violence thrilled me was an understatement. Seriously, shouldn’t this kid be in Child Protective Services by now? Stars: French Stewart, Joanna Going, Missi Pyle ![]()
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